这个放了25年的蜘蛛人罐头，恐怕就连蜘蛛人系列死忠粉丝都不敢恭维。我们都知道罐头可以放很久，但放25年也未免太久！一名外国网友在防疫（武汉肺炎，又名新冠肺炎、COVID-19）隔离期间翻箱倒柜，寻找食物期间意外寻获1995年买的蜘蛛人通心粉罐头。
Opening a wildly corroded can of Spider-Man Pasta from 1995: a thread. (1/5) pic.twitter.com/DW7w7ALMO4
— Dinosaur Dracula (@DinosaurDracula) April 16, 2020
好奇之下，网友决定秉著冒险精神打开放了25年的罐头，看看里面变成什么世界。开罐的过程可说是困难重重，因为罐头本身早已生锈变形。
I put the can opener to work, unsettled by the rust, but emboldened by the lack of noxious fumes. I turn the knob and wince, unable to rule out the possibility that the contents have mutated into something alive & malevolent. (2/5) pic.twitter.com/IBmJXBWZI2
— Dinosaur Dracula (@DinosaurDracula) April 16, 2020
打开惊见，原本15盎司的通心粉，竟变异成3盎司的一团大便状物，「还好我有戴手套」，他惊险表示。
They say tragedy plus time equals comedy, but there’s nothing funny about 15 ounces of Spider-Man Pasta reduced to a rotted 3-ounce chunk. Recalling the fate of Jordy Verrill in Creepshow, I’m thankful for my rubber gloves. (3/5) pic.twitter.com/W5WqQ7wEHs
— Dinosaur Dracula (@DinosaurDracula) April 16, 2020
他小心翼翼将那团物体取出，据他形容，看起来像迪士尼乐愿的矿山火车云霄飞车（Big Thunder Mountain Railroad）和《星际大战二部曲：复制人全面进攻》（Star Wars Episode II: Attack of the Clones）片中吉诺斯星人蜂巢的综合体。
I carefully remove the mass, which looks like a cross between Big Thunder Mountain and one of those Geonosian hives from Attack of the Clones. (4/5) pic.twitter.com/PIchW9mdMy
— Dinosaur Dracula (@DinosaurDracula) April 16, 2020
云霄飞车：
吉诺斯星人蜂巢：
原本该是蜘蛛人形状的通心粉，如今变成像是岩石上的刻痕，让他哭笑不得。最后恶搞蜘蛛人台词表示，「抱歉啦彼得，通心粉放月久，就越无法下肚。」
I think I notice something, but consult the label on the can to be sure. Indeed, there’s poor Spider-Man, trapped in this godforsaken toxic monstrosity. I’m sorry, Peter. With old pasta comes great instability.
Thank you all for taking this journey with me. (5/5) pic.twitter.com/6UcfRcN9tz
— Dinosaur Dracula (@DinosaurDracula) April 16, 2020
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